You’ve got a sneaking suspicion about your gal pal. All the signs seem to point one way, but she just laughs it off whenever you ask. Listen, some women take a long time to come out fully, even to themselves. But if you keep your eyes peeled, her true colors will show themselves.
She Dresses In A Gender-Neutral Style
If her closet is filled with button-down shirts, slacks, and she doesn’t wear much makeup, it could mean she doesn’t like to show her feminine side. A lot of lesbians prefer to dress in a more gender-neutral way that doesn’t focus on things seen as traditionally feminine.
She might choose pants over skirts or shirts over blouses. But don’t take this as a definite sign by itself because there are tons of “femme” lesbians out there who look super feminine.
The way someone dresses or presents themselves doesn’t on its own determine their sexuality, but dressing in a neutral or masculine style, along with other things, could mean she’s into other women.
Her Friend Group Is Mostly Male
If she’s mostly hanging out with guys, it could be a sign she’s more into them than she lets on. Not that there’s anything wrong with having guy friends, but pay attention if she seems way more comfortable around men than women.
Maybe she’s not very lovey-dovey with her girlfriends or seems stressed in situations with just females. If she’d rather watch the game with the boys than go shopping or get brunch with the girls, it could be because she feels weird in scenes that are usually for ladies.
When she’s with men, she can talk about other women freely and feel more comfortable, especially if her male buddies know she plays for the other team.
She Doesn’t Talk About Men or Dating
Ever notice how she avoids discussing romance or relationships? When you and the other girls are gossiping about cute guys or hot dates, she doesn’t join in. And if you try to set her up with someone, she always has a reason why she can’t make it.
Now, I’m not saying some women don’t like sharing all the details. But if she never brings up guys ever, that could mean she’s just not into them. Her not opening up might be because she’s scared to tell you something personal about who she’s actually attracted to.
She Seems Uninterested When You Talk About Attractive Male Celebrities
She fails to chime in when you and your friends are gushing over the latest Hollywood heartthrob or pop star crush, If the conversation turns to hunky male celebs like Brad Pitt, Justin Timberlake or Chris Hemsworth, and she suddenly goes quiet or changes the subject, that could be a sign, she’s just not that into guys.
Many closeted lesbians feel uncomfortable discussing men in a romantic or sexual way. Instead of showing interest in what you all are talking about or sharing which actor guys she thinks are attractive, she might avoid the topic altogether or try to steer you in a different direction.
Now imagine if you, as a straight dude, had to discuss other male celebrities. You probably wouldn’t find it comfortable either.
She Makes Excuses To Avoid Intimate Contact With Men
If she’s always coming up with reasons why she can’t get physically intimate with a man, that’s a clue she may prefer women. Excuses like “I have a headache”, “I’m too tired” or “I have to wake up early” sound familiar? When a woman isn’t interested in men that way, she’ll avoid situations that could lead to sex.
She may say she wants to take it slow and needs more time before things get physical. But if she’s been on a few dates with a guy and still doesn’t want to even kiss or cuddle, that’s probably a sign she’s not attracted to guys in that way. Some women who haven’t come out yet will even pretend to be interested in sex to seem normal, then make up an excuse at the last minute to avoid it.
She Says She’s Single Because She’s Focused On Her Career
This excuse is used quite often by women who aren’t ready to come out of the closet yet. Focusing on one’s career is perfectly fine, but if she never shows any interest in men or dating in general, it may be an indication that she is attracted to other women romantically.
“Are you seeing anybody? No, I really want to focus on my job right now and become more financially stable on my own.” That is likely the type of response she would give. Of course, every person’s journey is different, but this is a common experience for lesbians or bisexual women who aren’t fully comfortable with their identity.
She Adopts Cats
Has your lady friend recently adopted a cat or two? This could be a sign she’s seeking companionship from the feline persuasion. Lots of lesbians like having cats because it gives them something to take care of and get affection from.
Caring for cats lets her show love and nurturing without a partner. I’m sure the purring and cuddles from her furry friends help fill that emotional need.
You know, a lot of lesbians refer to themselves as “cat ladies.” So if a woman calls herself that or just really seems to love her cats, there’s a good chance she’s lesbian. Not a 100% guarantee, but it’s probably a sign she’d be open to dating other women.
She Doesn’t Discuss Personal Relationships
If she’s tight-lipped about who she’s dating or frequently brushes off questions about her love life, she may be hiding the fact that she’s lesbian. Rather than talking openly about her relationships or crushes like most straight girls do, she avoids the topic altogether.
When her friends start gushing about some cute guy they met, she tunes out of the conversation. And when asked directly about her own dating life, she gives a vague, evasive response and quickly changes the subject. She fears that if she does start talking about dating, she may accidentally reveal too much and out herself before she’s ready.
She also might not want to talk about relationships because she doesn’t want to deal with questions about why she never had a boyfriend. Or she could be trying to avoid her friends and family constantly trying to set her up on dates with guys. The less she says about love and dating, the less chance people will realize what’s really going on.
Look At Her Nails
I know generalizations can be iffy, but a lot of lesbians I’ve known tend to keep their nails on the shorter side. And it isn’t just because it’s more comfortable (if you know what I mean wink wink.) I think for a lot of them, it’s just more practical. Why bother with long nails if they’re going to get in the way or be a hassle to take care of when your time could be better spent doing other stuff? I’d say short nails are a good sign someone might not be too into dudes.
